Frank Is Dead Stories
by Charlotte Thompson
Summary: Our favorite RHPS character remains R.I.P.. Uses Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again (Phantom of the Opera) and Thinking of You (Katy Perry acoustic version). T for language and making out in the first, the only kind of bittersweet funny one.


**Story 1- Day after**

Brad and Janet stayed at Dr. Scott's. His car was still wrecked. He had gone to Frank's mansion and was currently in a mixture of debris and drag. He sat on the couch.

"That Frank-N-Furter. He is nozing but trouble!" Dr. Scott proclaimed. Brad was trying very hard to not stand up for Frank.

"He chased me all around the fu…" Janet started.

"Stupid." Dr. Scott proclaimed.

"Stupid mansion." Janet answered.

Brad was resisting the urge to roll his eyes. "If it weren't for Frank, you never would have met Rocky." He pointed out.

"And she vouldn't be dubbed a slut." Dr. Scott explained.

"Who calls me a slut?" Janet exclaimed.

Both ignored the question. "But she loves Rocky. She told me so." Brad pointed out.

"Um _she_ in the room!" Janet exclaimed.

Dr. Scott said "Ah women don't know what they want. What they really want is cold hard security."

"Sexist much? And have you _seen_ the size of Frank's mansion?" Janet questioned.

"Well, I know Janet wants love, which is why I said 'I love you' in the proposal song six times." Brad said.

"You should still try. Zough it goes against every instinct in my body I vill make you two sleep in ze same bed." Dr. Scott said. Janet's eyes became buggier than normal. Brad tried to not show that it would sound better to jump off a bridge than to screw around with Janet.

They sighed and were escorted to the other room where they were given clean clothes and a chance to take a shower. After all this, Brad laid down on the bed. He had found a way to wear as much clothes as humanly possible and still be comfortable. Janet came in in an oversized shirt.

She asked "So are we going to try to be a couple again?'

Brad started. "Well, it wouldn't hurt to try…" He knew he was lying. He was gay. Very very gay.

Janet laid down beside him. They started making out. Brad moved to the top. Janet was enjoying this, not nearly as much as when she was kissing Rocky, though.

Out of the corner of Brad's eye he saw Frank, his ghost anyways.

"Oh someone is finally on top for once. Good job Brad." Frank said, sitting on the corner of the bed next to where they were making out.

Brad thought "What the hell is going on? If I was pretending Janet was Frank he would be beneath me."

"Honey, this isn't a dream. I am a ghost. I am actually way out of my limits but since we were actually soul mates my bond to you allowed me to be here."

"We are soul mates?" Brad thought.

"Yeah, apparently when you kick the bucket find all that shit out."

"Huh."

"Apparently you could recognize the real thing better than me."

"Well if I had to be with a girl it would be this one. And your kiss was better than this one."

"This is so I can check in on you and double check that you don't wind up marrying Janet or having a not adopted family."

"Why would that be bad?"

"You aren't being honest with yourself." Frank answered.

"Well what is the problem with that?"

"Brad, you admitted to your huge crush on Freddie Mercury."

"Fuck." Brad thought. Frank laughed.

Janet was having a similar predicament in her head. Rocky was on the other side.

He waved.

Janet was shocked. "Rocky! Why are you here?" She asked mentally.

"Soul mates." He said. Janet smiled.

"You are my soul mate." She accidently said out loud.

"What do I do?" Brad asked.  
"I have no fucking clue! I'm just here to make sure you don't fuck her!" Frank said.

"Um what was that?" Brad asked.

"Oh nothing." Janet said. Janet thought "I love you so much Rocky!"

"I love you too, Janet." Rocky said.

"Can you like possess Brad or something? He kisses like a golden retriever." She said.

Rocky shook his head no.

Brad asked in thought "So Frank how am I supposed to get out of this? Why can't you possess her or something?"

"Tell her the truth, Brad." Frank said.

"But I am forced to be making out with her."

"Well I mean it isn't like either one of you is excited. Besides Brad, three layers of clothing are way too much. Seriously. People need your clothes in Africa for shelter. You could make a great tent."

"You aren't helping."

"I told you what to do."

"But I can't tell her I'm gay!" Brad exclaimed aloud accidentally. Janet stopped.

"Wait you're gay?"

"I thought you told me you saw the screen and Frank and I were in bed together."

"For all I knew he raped you. Well, that's what I was telling myself anyways."

"No. It isn't rape if I liked it. Unt I did." Brad said. Janet laughed a bit.

"Frank was great, but I preferred Rocky." Janet said.

Brad fell back onto the bed "Thank god. I love Frank." He said.

Frank smiled. He whispered "I love you too."

"I miss them. Mainly Rocky. He really learned well from Frank." Janet said.

"I miss Frank. Rocky wasn't my type. I think I swam between his legs during that one really awkward orgy thing in an effort to get to Frank, but otherwise, no." Brad said.

"I kissed a girl in that moment."

"Columbia was alright, but there was no spark same thing with you."

"Rocky and I had lots and lots of spark." Janet said.

Frank, Brad and Rocky all said "Oh we know."

"This may sound weird, but I saw Rocky in my head." Janet said.

"The same thing happened with Frank."

"Ok. I don't feel as weird."

"I just miss him." Brad admitted. Frank kissed Brad's forehead.

"If you need me to, I could always walk through you." Frank suggested.

Brad smiled. Janet said "I just wish there was some way they could be back."

Brad sighed. "When he is buried I am so performing Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again."

"Well believe me I am haunting my own theatre." Frank answered. Brad hugged the air Frank was occupying.

Janet did the same with Rocky. Frank kissed Brad. "I apparently have someone in my castle who I have to scare away. I will come back. I promise."

Rocky kissed Janet. "Promise."

"Promise." Janet answered.

The two left, leaving Brad and Janet alone and missing their other pieces.

**Story 2- Five Years Later Brad**

Brad stood with Janet in Frank's back yard. Riffraff and Magenta had come back to bury Frank and Rocky, once the mansion was starting to smell like something died. Rocky and Frank were on other sides of the vast and dismal field. Brad and Janet designed the gravestones. Brad designed Frank's epically beautiful engraved tombstone, made to resemble Christine's tombstone from The Phantom of the Opera. Rocky's was a huge rock with his name carved in it and all the information and glitter. Brad journeyed through the dead grass and other black foliage. It had been left alone for a good five years or so. Brad and Janet visited on the anniversary every single year.

He sang as he walked (in a lower register) "You were once my true companion

You were all that mattered

You were once a friend and lover

Then my world was shattered

Wishing you were somehow here again

Wishing you were somehow near

Sometimes it seemed if I just dreamed

Somehow you would be here" Brad fought the urge to cry. He thought of Frank, then continued. "Wishing I could hear your voice again

Knowing that I never would

Dreaming of you won't help me to do

All that you dreamed I could." Brad still had never come out to anyone other than Janet.

"Passing bells and sculpted angels, cold and monumental

Seem for you the wrong companions, you were warm and gentle" He continued. He gave up singing for awhile, continuing onto Frank's grave, letting the tears flow. He saw it and sang passionately "Too many years

Fighting back tears

Why can't the past just die?

Wishing you were somehow here again

Knowing we must say goodbye

Try to forgive

Teach me to live

Give me the strength to try!

No more memories

No more silent tears

No more gazing across the wasted years" He stared for a good minute at the grave.

"Help me say goodbye

Help me say goodbye." He sang, bawling. He collapsed to his knees at Frank's grave. "I love you." He told the ground. He knew beneath it was a decomposed corpse, but it was his decomposed corpse. He kissed where his lips were below. He cried until Janet came back with raccoon eyes and her guitar. She held him and let him cry into her shoulder.

**Story 3- Five Years Later Janet **

Janet typically talked to Rocky. "This year I learned to play guitar. I also became a Katy Cat so I assumed between the two, it would be the best year to do this." She took out her guitar. She wore a lace black dress with a jean jacket and boots. She sang "Comparisons are easily done

Once you've had a taste of perfection

Like an apple hanging from a tree

I picked the ripest one

I still got the seed" She swallowed.

Then continued "They say move on

Where do I go?

I guess second best

Is all I will know

'Cause when I'm with him

I am thinking of you

Thinking of you

What you would do if

You were the one

Who was spending the night

Oh I wish that I

Was looking into your eyes"

She took a breath.

"You're like an Indian summer

In the middle of winter

Like a hard candy

With a surprise center

How do I get better

Once I've had the best?

They say there's

Tons of fish in the water

So the waters I will test

He kissed my lips

I taste your mouth

He pulled me in

I was disgusted with myself" She sang. She kept trying to hold the tears back and not allow her voice to crack. Her voice started to falter as she sang

"'Cause when I'm with him

I am thinking of you

Thinking of you

What you would do if

You were the one

Who was spending the night

Oh I wish that I

Was looking into...

You're the best

And yes I do regret

How I could let myself

Let you go

Now, now the lesson's learned

I touched it I was burned

Oh I think you should know" She couldn't fight the tears as she sang

"'Cause when I'm with him

I am thinking of you

Thinking of you

What you would do if

You were the one

Who was spending the night

Oh I wish that I

Was looking into your eyes

Looking into your eyes

Looking into your eyes

Oh won't you walk through

And bust in the door

And take me away

Oh no more mistakes

'Cause in your eyes I'd like to stay... stay." Janet finished.

"I practiced that for hours everyday. I drove Brad insane with that song. I love you. I hate being around Brad. I want you. I hope I was good. I miss you desperately. All I want is your kiss again." She explained. "I know you can't talk back, but I wish you could. Then maybe I could feel whole again." Janet let herself cry for a good couple of minutes before checking to make sure Brad was still okay.


End file.
